My Soul Whispers

WHY I WRITE

My soul whispers to me of a time when I can be me. A time when the opinions and judgments of others become completely irrelevant. A time when mistakes are not judged as wrong. A time when my soul is allowed to express freely. A time when a thought becomes as important as an action. A time when my love for myself is as important as the love I receive from others. My soul is begging for this time. It is craving this. It is asking me on a daily basis to allow this part of myself out. This is my writing. This is why I write. It is this unwinding and unfolding of all of the years of feeling pent up. It is the allowing of this part of me that feels like it was held back. It is the allowing of this beautiful part of my soul to finally come out and play.

ALLOWING ME TO BE ME

There is nothing more freeing than allowing me to be me. For years, I felt I had to be somebody else. Whatever was coming out of me was not acceptable. Now, I know this is false. What was trying to come out of me was beautiful. For some reason, when I sit in front of a computer and write, another entity seems to show up. I don't quite understand it. It's as if I am downloading a message from a part of me that has been dormant for years. It was actually only dormant, because I pushed it down and ignored it. It was there the whole time. It was always in the background wanting to come out.

ALLOWING THE VOICE TO BE HEARD

A whisper. A voice calling to me. This is what my writing seems like. Am I alone in this? No. There are many others on the planet that have this gift. I am grateful that I have it. It is a beautiful part of me. Forming ideas seems to be easy when I get out of the way of these downloads. When I stop judging them, they seem to come more clearly and more rapidly. It is the constant judging and critiquing that gets in the way. When I can say "Wow! What you are saying to me is amazing", I am on a better path. I am allowing this voice to be heard. This voice it seems it usually one of love.

And, I fear that voice sometimes. This is another reason I resist it. I think that the voice is going to be angry or harsh. It is not. The voice that is trying to break through the clutter in my mind is one of incredible beauty. It is pure. It is resilient. It has survived the trauma of me trying to shut it down for 40 plus years. It is the voice of love. It is the voice of truth. It is the voice of my truth. The truth that I have been trying to ignore for years. The truth that I am an amazing human being, that has a message of love for the world. It is the voice of one who believes that humans are actually decent people.

WHAT DID HE SAY?

Forever, I thought that people would think I'm crazy to think that humans can be decent people. I thought someone might try to lock me up if I dared to express that people can be wonderful. I mean, how could I believe such craziness when all I have to do is turn on the news to see the next horrible thing that happened. I refused to believe it has to be that way. In fact, I even tried to have friends who were cynical about the world. It didn't work. In my private life, I do sometimes complain about the state of the world. But, really this is my way of trying to get out my frustration with not understanding why people treat each other so badly. It just doesn't make sense to me.

THE REACTIONS FROM OTHER PEOPLE

So, I find myself every time just trying to make sense of it all. I am a highly sensitive, introverted, empath. I absorb every energy that I feel in the world around me. I always have. This is wonderful, and this is very challenging. When I made the decision that I was going to allow these messages and voices out of my soul, I become immediately aware that I was going to have to deal with the feedback I would get from other people. People were going to react. They would have opinions about what I shared. They would love it. They would get angry at it. They would ignore it. They may laugh at it. Whatever. Everyone was going to have a different reaction. But, I decided I was going to carry on.

MY SOUL WHISPERED TO ME

Here I am carrying on. Today, I am doing whatever I can to let my message of hope and love out into the world. I have developed so many different avenues on which I am expressing. On social media, my blogs, my book, speaking, podcasts, and however else God is allowing me to express I will continue to do.

I do not know what the end result of all of this is. I don't know where it is going. I just know that my life has opened up in a way like never before. I am experiencing a joy within my soul that I didn't know was there. Actually, I always knew it was there. I just never thought anyone else would care to see it. Now I know that is not true. There are many others like me. There are many who want to spread joy and hope to others. I am indeed finding my tribe after all of these years. I am coming home to embrace a part of myself once abandoned. It is a part of me that I almost completely gave up on. I didn't completely give up. I just needed to get to a place in my life when I needed to be desperate enough to change.

I got desperate enough. The voices of love are finally coming forth. It is my time. It is a beautiful time in my life. And, the voices of love from inside me are finally grateful that they are being heard.

My soul whispers to me "Thank you John. Thank you".

What is your soul whispering to you?