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Showing posts from December, 2019

Asking for Help

IS ASKING FOR HELP A SIGN OF WEAKNESS? Why is it difficult for some of us to ask for help? Why does it seem like help is a dirty word, something to be avoided at all costs? For many of us, asking for help is admitting failure. It is viewed as a weakness to be avoided at all costs. I teach music in schools several days a week. I appreciate it when a student asks for help with something. I see it as a sign of maturity and strength when they ask me for help. It is my job to help them. It is what I am being paid for. Why then would I interpret my asking for help as a weakness?   I believe it comes down to thinking that I should have everything under control. Ultimately, the desire for control is about managing fear. It's the fear that if I don't have a say in something, things will go poorly for me. MANAGING THE FEAR The truth is that I have no control over anyone or anything outside of me. Control is an illusion. It keeps me in fear, and it keeps me feeli

Being Kind to You is the Greatest Gift You Can Give Yourself

A GIFT TO YOURSELF Being kind to you is the greatest gift you can give yourself. You are the only you that exists. When you are kind to you, you are respecting the One who made you. In the mind of your Creator you are infinitely precious. For years, I thought being kind to myself was being selfish. I was taught that I should always be thinking of others. I was taught that when I care about myself, it must mean that I don't care about anyone else. Self sacrifice was a badge of honor, and frankly was expected . Recently, my thinking has changed. This change has moved me to a more loving place. I was getting frustrated by not finding enough time to write, exercise, sleep, and a whole host of other important  self- care activities. I was putting everyone else's needs before my own. It didn't work. I was getting frustrated, and began blaming others for not taking care of myself. I found that I was tired all of time, and wasn't happy about how I was showing up fo

Introducing Accept Connect Heal

Today is an important day for me. My first book Accept Connect Heal: A Vision of Hope for Our World is available on Amazon. Accept Connect Heal is my vision for how we can interact with each other in a more loving way. It is my declaration that I believe in the goodness of the human spirit. It is hopeful. And, I believe it is realistic. Spoken in very simply language, the goal of Accept Connect Heal is to give the reader the sense that they can make a positive difference in the world. This book does not declare that I am right about any of this. In fact, it invites the reader to make up their own mind about these things. When we support each other to make up our own minds and have our own opinions, we are declaring that all people are worthy of respect. We can allow them to have their own process, and come to their own conclusions. When we choose to build these bridges, we will connect. And, when we connect with each other we can heal each other. Accept Connect Heal came to m