The Original You

  Do I really know what you need? I don’t. I used to think I did. Thinking I knew what other people were supposed to do used to get me into all kinds of trouble. I used to know why my friend was rude to his spouse. I used to know how to fix the economy. I used to know how certain politicians should act. I used to know how my friends should react to me. I used to know how my best friend can improve his marriage. I used to know all kinds of things. What I know now is that other people are the best judge of what is best for them. Most of the time. Allow me to be real here. There are lots of people in the world who do not have the ability to make choices that are for their own good. Therefore, we have medical surrogates, care takers, and other kind people looking out for those who are vulnerable and cannot make their own decisions. We need the care takers in this world who are willing to protect the vulnerable. I’m grateful for those who want the best for those who ca...

Joy. Is it possible to live a joyful life all the time? What would that even look like? Would you even want that? Wouldn’t being in joy mean that I must be in denial about all the trials and difficulties of this world? I contemplate this idea of joyful living as I look out at the panorama of life. I turn on the tv, look at the internet, listen to the pain of friends and family. Where is the joy? Is it possible to feel it during all of this? Yes. Joy is possible. Joy is a choice. It cannot be dependent upon what is happening or not happening around me. The joy I’m talking about is not the kind of joy that we associate with celebrating or taking a Pollyanna view of life, where everything works out perfectly for everyone in the end. The joy I’m talking about is the kind of joy that will carry you through that most difficult and painful of circumstance. This is the joy that doesn’t wait until the storm passes. This is the joy that believes in things unseen. This is the joy that will be abl...

I woke up this morning in a lot of physical pain. I tried walking to the bathroom but could not except with the help of my wife. My ankle was slowly getting sorer every day, but today was the day when I could not walk under my own steam. Thank God for my caring wife. Yes, I went to the podiatrist and got it evaluated. The result is that there is some issue with my tendon, and I need to wear a boot for three weeks. I’m only going to complain for a moment. Lots of people have it far worse than me right now. But I do need to say that it really stinks and that I feel sad about it. Ignoring those feelings or pretending that everything is fine is not good either. Even getting angry at the situation is probably healthy right now. Anger, sadness, and frustration are a part of life. They are normal healthy feelings. I know people who pretend that situations that are awful are not a problem. I don’t think that’s healthy. What I’m trying to convey is that the way through this situation is accepta...

I am here for a reason. So are you. One of the greatest thrills of being alive is discovering why we are here. What is the purpose of all of this? Is there some greater mission that we are fulfilling that gives our life a meaning and purpose? Having a meaning and purpose gives me fuel for pursuing the things in life that matter to me. It gives me something to look forward to. It lifts my spirits and gives me confidence. I didn’t always have that feeling. For many years I had no idea what my purpose in life was. I just kind of meandered through life hoping that something would happen that would get me motivated. It wasn’t until I met my wife ten years ago that I began to find my purpose. When I was divinely led to her, I was given a purpose. I discovered that one of the reasons I am alive is to learn how to love myself and to love another person. For most of my life those two concepts seemed elusive. I was not a kind person to myself, and I certainly was not kind to other people. What l...

  Ten years of joy. This is what this has been. On August 13, 2010 my wife Rachel and I began living together. One of the best decisions I have ever made. I want to take a few moments to tell you why this has been so good for me in hopes that it may inspire you to take this beautiful chance on love someday (if you haven’t already). When we decided to live together it was a decision that was obvious. There was no question about whether it was going to be a good thing or not. Rachel and I had been dating for some time. When it came time to talk about living together, we were both excited. Living together has always been fantastic. The moving process for me was not so great. I tend to hold on to lots of stuff, and her moving in was a great opportunity for me to find out what stuff was important and what was not. Letting go of those “unimportant” things was not easy for me. I have tended to associate some of my self-worth with the amount of stuff I own. This process cha...

  I must turn it all over. Every day. Every moment of every day. We are all living in a time of great uncertainty. The plans you made for this year are probably different from the reality of what is happening. The health of your family, security of your job, and even your living situation may be in doubt. It’s all a big question mark right now. As I contemplate my future, I realize that there are many unknowns. I turn it over. I turn it all over. When I turn over my life, I need to know that there is a loving force in the universe that is taking care of me. Without this loving force in my life I would be in tremendous fear. Throughout the pandemic there have been many moments when I have doubted the security that I have relied on.   Thankfully those moments are short and very fleeting. On a daily and moment to moment basis I have been turning everything over to God. Every cancellation, every disappointment, every fear, every frustration, and every anxiety are...

In a deep meditation I felt the beating of my heart. I was so still that I felt the beautiful vibration in my chest. I heard it. I drank in the beauty of its magnificent power. Sitting in the stillness came a realization that forever changed my life. It might change yours. I didn’t have the power to make my heart keep beating. I couldn’t get into my chest and make it pump not even one beat. I was unable to make it transport the blood from my heart to all the vital organs of my body. I had and still don’t have any power over this. It’s very humbling and awe inspiring to understand the magnitude of this truth. This understanding invites me to ask some questions. Who or what is keeping my heart beating? How long will it keep beating? Will I have any say in keeping it going beyond how long it wants to beat? The most difficult thing for me in all of this is knowing that someday my heart will stop beating. There is no getting around this truth. It’s going to happen. While I’m still here I wi...

  Community is everything. We all need it. It’s not a want; it’s a need. From the beginning of time, we have all sought after community. It is how we have survived. From the very first cave man needing his friend to watch his family while he went hunting, to today when we need each other to help keep a roof over our head. God created us this way on purpose. It was in the plan for us to need each other. There are many people struggling right now with how they must interact with the communities that matter to them. You may be one of them. You are not alone. Students are having to be away from their social supports at school. Congregants are away from their churches. Workers are away from their offices. These changes in our communities can cause stress and anxiety. We are not used to having things change so rapidly in such a short period of time. It’s one thing to experience societal changes. This is normal. It’s not normal or comfortable to have so many things change al...

I have a tenuous relationship with the word uncomfortable. I want to be comfortable all of the time, and I realize that my growth comes from being in uncomfortable situations. For much of my life I believed that being comfortable meant that I was making great progress in my life. I wanted the nice house with the nice car. I wanted the job that didn’t cause me any stress. The issue isn’t with wanting these things. It’s in believing that I need to be comfortable all of the time. As I get older, I am learning that it’s good for me to be put into uncomfortable situations. I need to be around people who look different than me, who are in different economic situations, and have different life experiences than me. This is the only way that I grow. I need to try new things and experiment. I think of the caterpillar who needs to push against the walls of the cocoon to become the beautiful butterfly. By pushing its way out of the cocoon, the wings become strong enough to f...

What if you knew you were a healer? What if you knew it in your soul? Would it change your life? Take a deep breath and really think about this. Contemplate it. Let it sink in. This idea of being a healer. Shouldn’t that be reserved for the deities of our world? Isn’t it only the gurus and spiritual masters that have the power to heal? No. It is not only the spiritual masters that have this power. You have it too. When you sit next to the elderly woman on the park bench and listen intently to their story of pain, you have become a healer. When you listen with kindness to the pain of a friend who is ill, you have become a healer. When you call your daughter to listen to their struggles with their boyfriends, you have become a healer. When you allow your mom to cry on your shoulder, you have become a healer. Healing occurs when we consider the lives of others. When we can embrace the reality of other’s struggles, we become their healer. This is what we are all looking ...

From the beginning of time your essence has existed. Whether it was in spirit form or now in your physical form you have always been and always will be. There is a reason why your Creator decided to make you eternal. It’s because you’re worthy. You’re valuable. You’re valuable not because of what your job title is, how much money you have, what kind of clothes you wear, or even the color of your skin. You’re valuable because you have always existed in some form. The very earth from the time it was formed was getting ready for you. Every piece of dirt, every mineral, every animal, every drop of water, every flower, has been getting ready for you. Every tree, every lake, and every farm has been created to support and love you. Knowing that you are supported by every living being is what your heart has always known. You know that what I write is true. Your heart knows that you are the precious result of billions of years of evolution. Evolution is still o...

I stepped towards the stern of the boat and waited. The captain said the three magic words, “Dive, dive, dive!” Some of my favorite words in the world. As I looked upon the horizon I jumped in with anticipation. My wife had the dive flag on this beautiful drift dive in Boynton Beach, FL. There were some rough seas that day, so it was better to be in the water than on the surface. As I floated down towards the reef, I got that magical sensation once again of floating in space. It is an amazing experience. We landed 60 feet down on this magic reef. I share this story, because I want to convey to you the magic of scuba diving and its effects on my life over the past eight years. When I am diving, I feel like I have been transported to another world. It feels like I am floating in the womb of God. It feels like I am being held by the very spirit of my Creator who made the beautiful ocean. As I gazed upon the reef last Friday, I was reminded that the world that I know above th...

We need a healing. In our world we need a healing. Our world is in pain in a different way than it’s been in a long time. Of course, it’s not the first time, and it’s certainly not the last. What gives me hope is remembering that our planet has survived many periods of great difficulty and somehow survived. Our history books document the many periods of great pain that our planet has endured including the birth of the planet itself. I look upon the history of our earth and I receive great comfort in knowing that we will survive. I turn on the news and I see stories of heroism taking place every day. I see people going out of their way to do great deeds for people less fortunate than them. This is who we are. This is what we came here to do. From a spiritual perspective I see the turmoil in the world as a great opportunity for us to love each other more. There are numerous ways that we can reach out to our brothers and sisters right now. Healing begins from within. Whe...

Has anyone ever called you an expert? Have they declared that you know what you are doing in a certain area? I have been called that at certain points in my life. When I hear it, I am always left with a lingering thought about how they know I’m an expert. What is it that certified me as an expert? Expertise comes with a lot of time and experience. It comes with lots of practice and lots of failures. It is backed up with a long history of mistakes and learning from them. I appreciate when people call me an expert in something, but I don’t ever want to think that I have arrived. I don’t want to think that I have reached the pinnacle in any area of my life. To reach the pinnacle would mean that I can’t go any further. It would mean that I can’t learn any more about a certain thing. That would be boring to me. I don’t want to be bored. I’m always striving to be a better musician, a better writer, a better husband, and a better human being. If I believed that I was an expert I might...

Do you get impatient with the speed of your process? Do you get frustrated when things don’t go the way you intended them to? I do. I get frustrated a lot. I get frustrated when I don’t follow through on something. I get frustrated when I don’t learn something as fast as I want to. I get frustrated when I can’t remember a name or date. I want everything to go faster than it is. When I’m in the state of impatience, I lose sight of the beauty of the plan. My Creator has a plan for me. It is my job to ask for guidance to help me carry it out. This is not to say that I have no choice about how things go. I can choose to steer my life in many different directions. There is a reason for everything. The idea that I’m somehow like a cork floating on the sea of life going wherever with no direction doesn’t resonate with me. Hindsight is a beautiful tool you can use to help you be gentle with your process. Looking back at your life, you can remember times when situations worked ou...

It’s Independence Day in the United States on the day of this writing. As I’m moving through my day, I’m contemplating the idea of what freedom is. As I share my thoughts, I pray that they will stir you to think about what freedom looks like for you. When I think of freedom, I think of some obvious things. I’m not in an institution that requires me to be there. I can get in my car and drive to many destinations that I wish to go to. I can choose what religion I practice. I can decide what hair style I want. I get to choose what clothing to wear daily. I can love who I want to love. I am a blessed man. There are millions of people in this world who don’t have these freedoms. They’re not able to drive a car even if they owned one, they might be killed if they practice a religion, and they cannot love or marry the person of their choice. There are those that may argue that everyone is able to choose to do whatever they want and experience the consequences of those actions. Yes,...

How confident are you that your needs will be met? Do you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that everything will be supplied at the right time and in the right way? Most of my life my trust has been placed in things and people that were at best not reliable and sometimes dangerous. I gave away my power and trust to people and institutions that were not looking out for my good. Over the years I have learned to forgive myself for putting myself in these situations. I am making healthier decisions today that represent my belief that I deserve better for myself. What I have learned is that when I believe that I deserve to be treated well I will surround myself with people who treat me well. That sounds incredibly simple. And it is. It is the law of attraction. In life, we teach other people how to treat us. If we believe that we are unworthy of love and respect, we will surround ourselves with people who don’t respect us and treat us well. When we decide that we deserve...

From within you shines a light. It is from you, and it is you. You are part of a collective light that is shining through all of us. From the day you first existed you became a portal for the love of our Creator to shine upon the world. In spiritual form you were beautiful. Your physical form is still beautiful. This physical form is just a part of who you are. You are much more and always have been. As a human being it is my job on this planet to be a conduit for the light that is flowing through me. I am the hands and feet of my Creator. I was brought here to do the will of God in all things. The world around me can help me to understand how important the light from within is. Lighthouses are one example. I love lighthouses. There is something magical about them. On a regular basis, someone must clean the glass so that the light will shine more brightly. This cleaning is necessary, so that the ships passing by will be safe. It is this way in your life. For you to be the...

Have you ever said things to yourself that you regret, that hurt your spirit, or that are just not true? I have. I caught myself saying some last night. It’s an old habit. Maybe it’s more than a habit. It is something that I wish I didn’t do anymore. When I say unkind things to myself my spirit grieves. My spirit knows it’s being lied to. It’s being subjected to a line of thinking that is not true. And, it hurts my spirit. Here lies a golden opportunity. It’s an opportunity for growth. I believe it may be an opportunity for growth for you too. We have an opportunity to discover the truth of who and what we are. It’s a chance to get in touch with our real selves, and to create a beautiful inner and outer world for ourselves. When I go into quiet meditation and hear the beautiful voice of my Creator, I can again connect with my true and authentic self. I know the voice of my Creator. It’s clear to me when I hear these things. I offer this as a reminder that when you hear th...

I had one of those mornings. It doesn’t happen every day, but today it did. I got out of bed and thought about how grateful I am that I have another day of life. This blessed thought doesn’t come to me every day, but it’s nice when it does. I thought about all the things I am grateful for. 1.        I have a roof over my head. 2.        I get to wake up next to my wife who I love. 3.        I am breathing. 4.        I have a shower with clean warm water. 5.        My refrigerator has food in it. That list could go on and on. That was just a start. When I begin my day with gratitude the rest of my day seems to go better. Once I’m on that better track I can make healthier decisions for myself throughout the day. Gratitude is a magnet for good. It will bring all manner of situations to be grateful...